Yadayada: Well, maybe I have something

Friday, January 06, 2006

Tonight, I took yadayada's unwilling and utterly rubbish celebrity columnist out for dinner.

After hours of nothing she pipes up

"I shared a dormitory with Rachel Weisz at boarding school"

"Jesus Fucking Christ... and..." I splurt, leaping for my note pad.

"... and... and what?" she says disinterested, chomping on her bruschetta.

"And? And? Well.. err... err.. what colour were her pyjamas?" I say licking the end of my pencil.

"Hmm... can't remember"

"You can't remember? Ok, what about pillow fights? - lots of posh teenage girls in their underwear fighting on beds?"

"Oh, that was against the rules".

"Oh come on! You have to give me something"

"Well.. "

"Yes?"

"She made a very neat bed"

"Oh for fucks sake - you are rubbish!"

So there you have it - you heard it here first.

tim, you were just looking for Rachel Weisz on google weren't you?

By h, at 12:36 am
We were all just looking for Rachel Weisz on Google. Why you you not look for Rachel Weisz on Google?

I think I might join you, Sadia. Let's mess up that overly neat posh girl bed.

Tim can watch.

By Léonie, at 9:40 am
Normally I search for Rachel Weisz on google but I was taking a break.

I think you two have given Tim a heart attack.

Tim? Tim? You ok? {gets smelling salts}

By h, at 11:53 am
What a TEASE!

WHY drop the name Rachel Weisz if you don't have any "Friday night all-you-can-eat catfish" or "muff diving in Acapulco" story to follow it?

The only time "she made a nice bed" should be said after a woman's name is if you are talking about Consuelo Garcia, the Housekeeping Manager at the Hyatt.

Even then, if you were talking about twenty years ago when she was HOT, the "nice bed"-anecdote should be preceded by a carpet-munching escapade...

By Zen Wizard, at 12:36 am

Yadayada